Diets are seductive. Fact.
No matter how much you already know that, diets still have a sneaky way of drawing you in. They entice you with their too-good-to-be-true promises and all of a sudden you find yourself writing down your new eating plan and fantasising about how great life will be when you’re a lighter version of yourself.
So what is it that catches people? This belief might have something to do with it:
When I’m skinny, I’ll be happy.
Biggest. Lie. Ever.
Losing weight and getting skinny does not guarantee happiness. I repeat, does not guarantee you happiness. Why do we hold onto that belief?!
Nothing external to you can ever guarantee happiness, it’s a choice you make from within. You can be happy right now, literally right now in this moment. It’s your choice.
Have you ever delayed your happiness until sometime in the future with specific conditions in place? Be it a new job, moving overseas or buying a new car etc. And have you reached that point in time, the one where you said you’d be happy, only to find that life is exactly the same?
There was no magic switch that flicked on where you were suddenly basking in happiness and life was perfect and nothing ever went wrong, was there? And you were probably already looking ahead at the next thing, delaying your happiness again.
I see so many women who find it so hard to let go of the belief that they’ll be happy when they lose weight or achieve their dream body.
And what happens when they do lose the weight?
Yep, nothing changes. Life doesn’t become perfect. Not to mention all of a sudden it doesn’t seem enough. There needs to be more weight lost, new body goals met. When will it stop?
If you want to lose weight, you need to know this:
Whatever path you take, is where you’ll end up.
You have two options:
1. Take the restrictive, punishing diet path.
Yes, you might lose weight, but you’ll be freaked out when you do.
You’ll feel fearful of gaining the weight back, feel constricted, stressed and crazy. Because that’s the path you took to get there.
2. Take the self lovin’, I’m-choosing-to-be-happy-now-no-matter-what path.
Yes, you might lose weight, and it’ll feel easy and pleasurable, because your happiness doesn’t depend on it.
You won’t feel scared, instead you’ll feel free and happy in your body. Because you practised that along the way.
Trust me when I say I have experienced both of these options and it couldn’t be more true! I took path number 1 and was at my skinniest ever. But I was freaked out and living in constant fear of gaining weight back. I was miserable.
But I didn’t get it, I had lost the weight. Shouldn’t I be happy? Shouldn’t life be perfect now? It turns out it was just the same. And since I had practised delaying my happiness, I wasn’t satisfied. I started laying down new goals and numbers on the scale to reach.
Happiness had to come from within, it was my choice, not dependant on the size of my clothes.
It’s all too easy to delay your happiness and wait on the weight before truly living. But life is happening now! And happiness is a choice (just in case I didn’t say it enough already.)
What are you going to choose today?
P.S Want to dive deeper, learn how to permanently leave diet land and start feeling happy in your body? Click here to learn how to work with me.
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Jessica Silsby helps women overcome their challenges around eating and body image so that they can stop obsessing about food and start enjoying life.
After years of yo-yo dieting and battling with emotional eating, Jess healed her relationship with food and a passion was born to help others do the same. She went on to study at The Institute for the Psychology of Eating where she discovered holistic approaches to help women make peace with their food issues, once and for all.